Published:  12:53 AM, 11 September 2017

Tips on making a long distance relationship work

Tips on making a long  distance relationship work

Many people believe that long distance relationships are never going to work out. Your family may discourage it, and some of your best friends may advise you not to take it too seriously, in case you get your heart broken. Nobody says it is going to be easy - the extra distance makes many things unachievable.

Things could get complicated, and you could get sad and lonely at times. However, the extra distance also makes the simplest things the sweetest, being able to hold the other person's hand, eating together at the same table, feeling each other's touch, taking a walk together, smelling each other's hair… these small wishes could suddenly mean so much more in a long distance relationship. Long distance relationship may be tough but it has its own surprises too. To keep your love alive and strong, here are the 18 tips to make your long distance relationship work -
Avoid excessive communication: It is unwise to be overly "sticky" and possessive.

You two don't really have to communicate 12 hours a day to keep the relationship going. Many couples thought that they need to compensate for the distance by doing more. This is not true. And it might only make things worse. Soon you would get tired of "loving." Remember: Less is more. It is not about spamming - you are only going to exhaust yourselves. It's really about teasing at the right moments and tugging at the right spots.

Try to communicate regularly, and creatively: Greet each other "good morning" and "good night" every day - this is a must. On top of that, try to update your partner on your life and its happening, however mundane some of the things may seem. To up the game, send each other pictures, audio clips and short videos from time to time. By putting in this kind of effort, you make the other person feel loved and attended to.

Have a goal in mind: "What do we want to achieve at the end of the day?" "How long are we going to be apart?" "What about the future?" These are the questions you two need to ask yourselves. The truth is, no couple can be in a long distance relationship for forever. Eventually we all need to settle down. So make a plan with each other. Do up a timeline, marking down the estimated times apart and times together, and draw an end goal. It is important that you two are on the same page and have the same goals. So that even if you are not living in the same space and the same timezone, both of you are still working together in the same direction towards a future that includes one another.

Stay honest with each other: Talk about your feelings of fear, insecurity, jealousy, apathy, whatsoever. If you try to hide anything from your partner, that secret will sooner or later swallow you up from inside out. Don't try to deal with things all by yourself. Be open and honest with each other. Let your partner help you and give you the support you need. It's better to look at the problem during its initial stage than to only disclose it when it's all too late.

Know each other's schedules: It's helpful to know when the other person is busy and when he/she is free, so that you can drop a text or make a call at the right time. You wouldn't want to disturb your partner when he/she is in the middle of class or halfway through a business meeting. Know the small and big events that are taking place or will take place in each other's life e.g. college mid-terms and exams, important business trips and meetings, job interviews and etc. This is especially essential when the both of you are living in different time zones. (excerpt)

The writer is an online activist and contributor at  www.lifehack.org

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