Psych2Go is a community of psychology enthusiasts that has a Facebook page, Tumblr, twitter, Instagram, YouTube channel, magazines and even their own website. They usually want to make psychological issues available to everyone and they say they are designed by millennials for millennials.
They also have fun quizzes that you can agree or disagree with or even articles which talk more about popular things such as how people fall in love with another person. To more serious topics, which may include triggers for disorders and abuse, which the paper would like to put a warning out on.
They have pieces about anxiety, depression, toxic friends, self-maturity and also how to deal with toxic behaviours. They are very LGBTQIA+ friendly too so they are not judgmental or conservative. Psych2Go started off small on the net; I remember them making small snippets of psychological facts or tips around 5 years ago.
Now, they are a full-fledged community. As Psych2Go is still a community of psychological enthusiasts it is good to remind you now that they don't claim to be professionals and that one should consult a professional for serious problems.
The paper supports you in your struggles and wants to remind you there is no shame or weakness in seeking help for mental health.
The article I have opened in my own browser tab was written a year ago: It's called "Toxic Friendships: What a Mistake!" by Adelgado. Adelgado talks about three types of toxic friends: The Unawares, The Users and the Fakers. The Unawares are the people who try to play as your "therapist" and start interfering in your life way too much. As Adelgado elegantly put it: "These people have an opinion about every part of your life, from whom you should date to what college courses you should take.
The unaware believes that they are being a good friend because they have taken the time to analyze your life for you." Adelgado explains this is "off-putting" because you sometimes just want to talk about simple things with your friends. They don't take your permission to "inject" themselves in your life and often act they have a better perspective of your life than you do.
The Users are people who use you for their convenience. Yes, people can seek their friends for help and support and even at times monetary help but these things must be done on a respectful platform. "The user has very little boundaries and is very in tuned to certain people who 1) love to help or 2) have a hard time saying no. As a result, the user exploits their friend's loyalty and desire to be needed."
Ultimately, Adelgado talks about The Faker. The person who actually has a huge ego and is selfish to the max. "As such, fakers garner friendships with people who they deem less than. For example, a faker will befriend someone who they deem to be less attractive than them only to garner more attention from others when they go out in public.
Or, fakers will befriend a person who is dating someone, with the motive of stealing that person's significant other." Does toxic friendships sound familiar to you? They might be. I think most of us in our lives has had one toxic friend. Yet, people don't always talk about them. It is actually great to know that the nagging feeling you had about a friend may be validated through a psychology article.
Their most recent video published on July 1st, 2018 is "7 Signs You May Not Be Ready fora Relationship." There are some things I may disagree with the video but I have to say that reasons 1, 3 and 4 really do make some good points. Reason 1 is that you are constantly idealizing about the perfect partner. Yes, I will add that you should have a partner who shares interests and core beliefs with you. I even took one of their many fun quizzes and got I wanted an open and non-defensive partner as a choice, which I did agree with.
The thing is that we put impossible standards on people too: we want a Cinderella or a Prince Charming thinking they will never disappoint us or will always be our idealized version of perfect. That's not exactly healthy on both of you. Your perfect partner is human and also has their flaws so we should keep that in mind.
Reason 3 and 4 is not to believe that someone will save you or you can save someone. I know the latter as a savior complex. The thing is that relationships may heal you but may not necessarily "save" you - if you have serious problems take professional help. Also, if you are always thinking relationships will save you then abusive and toxic people, who are codependent and harassing, may find ways into your life.
Trying to save people may actually strip them off their agency and make them more "projects" than people. Your spouse or partner is not a project. You can help them but there must be mutual respect, mutually decided on boundaries and also mutual understandings of each other. You can't treat helpless individuals as your equals so the relationship is already compromised from the beginning.
Another article, by Alex Nunez is "5 Signs You're Dealing with a Passive- Aggressive Person." It was really well written and talked about some ways people seemingly do harmless things but are actually pretty toxic and destructive. He lists the five things are Silent Treatment, Subtle Insults, Procrastinating on Purpose, Sabotage and Keeping. For Procrastinating on Purpose and Sabotage he has illustrated things that actually seem innocent but harm us.
The former one he describes as: "This is a power move that passive-aggressive people use to show you that you need them and that you must adhere to their schedules. Holding off on helping you is a sign that they see your time as invaluable or lesser. Are they not getting off their butts after telling you they'd drive you to the mall? Take the bus! Let them know that healthy relationships aren't based on power imbalances, and you are your own person."
The latter he says: "Isn't it a little suspicious that your study partner chose the night before your quiz to remind you about it? Or that your roommate dug into your ice cream even though you clearly put a label on the tub? Yes, we get the message loud and clear. You're mad. But it doesn't make actions like these immature."
Then he asks you to take a look at yourself and realize are YOU the one doing these activities yourself. If so, halt them and apologize sincerely. The reason I chose some of these articles to discuss is that those of us living in South Asia have had a really quick boom of urbanization, globalization and the internet.
We sometimes face problems with understanding new modalities of cultures. Some people may use our South Asia expectancy of being kind and polite to be abusive and damaging. I could also advice not to make friends too quickly on the internet because we don't really know we are dealing with so we should be cautious. We may also face problems and pressurized to date when we are not ready.
Psych2Go is a community that does deal with new age problems. It is good to actually browse some of the topics and learn from them. It is fun, fresh and exciting and is catered to people who want to learn new things about the globalized world we live in.
The writer is a copy editor
at The Asian Age
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