Nawfa Nanziba Omama
Trust me when I say, being confident and egotistic are two different things. Unless you have a life without any heads up for some goal, there will always be a time when you just 'have to' have some confidence in yourself.
Confidence as in, being determined that you 'can' stand up across a crowd of people who'd be waiting for you to start talking; confidence as in, being pensive & willful enough to take up your 'own' responsibility before you may stand up for others. Confidence as in, being a strong-willed person who can stand up to any storm.
I've had my experience and being absolutely unassertive when you're at the frontline, when words don't exist and you go all mute while everyone's waiting for the slightest response; a scenario like this has always been embarrassing and frantic enough to make me want to ascend to God and never face those lounging people again.
But the world won't go with you; it won't hold your hand to success if it keeps seeing you fail without a break. First advice on gaining enough confidence, look at yourself before you venture around for lessons. Surely life goes on with its hours and days; and that doesn't mean it hasn't taught you anything besides memories and others.
Take a glance at your plate before reaching for another; perhaps, maybe, you'll be sitting all alone and vacant of ways to improve yourself; but there's always a way to hunt down methods to strengthen yourself. Look back, to the lessons you may have missed in those good and bad memories of life.
If you are a sole member of the 'soft culture', that doesn't mean any harm to your self-confidence; especially if you're trying to build it up. Being soft doesn't have to make you an introvert and trust me when I say, it won't get you anywhere. Remember, having confidence doesn't mean that you need to see yourself above minors.
Having confidence is as simple as walking on grass. But it'll be complicated to deal with if you think that you are on fancy patches instead of the ordinary, foe pride tends to make you feel beauty, when actually you're rotten.
What's funny, I'm writing on something that I myself don't have; honestly, I'm still on the way to build it up. Trust me when I say, life with a reluctant challenge if confidence isn't there, inside you, invincibly strong. I'm sure, once you 'do' develop confidence within you, there will be eyes prying on it, eventually making you think as if you messed up the persona.
And it's not necessarily always done perfectly. Everyone has a flaw, but it's a duty to perfect and master what you can. So far in life, I've came to realize that being shy won't always be the right thing to do in some situations. My tongue's tied, and it's this awfully bashful intention that's forever kept me from speaking up, even though I don't intentionally want to stay quiet.
Long topic short, with another small advice from an amateur herself, don't think you're incapable of facing a crowd no matter the size of it; as for an advice, and just believe in yourself no matter the storm. Remember, there can't be anyone else who can show you what's right and what's not, if you can't see it in your reflection.
I'll just say that in these 14 years of my life, I've been far from every successful my tongue and voice could've achieved. And for that, I've being pretty much hanging on to the small bits I can make out from the past memories that may have left an impact on me; perhaps such impacts I never thought would be important, at all.
For now, perhaps that's as much I can say or advice anyone on, since I myself am no more than an amateur. But yes, having faith in yourself is never a bad thing, nor is having confidence a thing that should let you down.
The writer is a freelancer
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