7 secrets to stylishly stand out

Dress according to your message:  It's always good before choosing what to wear for the day to think "What message do I want to send?" That message paves the way for what you require in terms of fabric, function and fit. If your goal is to make people believe you're a force to be reckoned with, you need clothing that shows it.

You need an outfit that represents the best version of yourself. It should stand out and exude power. For every item of clothing you need to ask: Does it fit my body? Does it fit my personality? Have I practiced wearing it? Feeling awesome in your clothes is what allows you to experience enclothed cognition.

This is where the brain channels that positive feeling into (1) a better performance and (2) a boost in confidence. That's why custom clothing matters. It's how you can get clothes that perfectly fit and complement you.


Take a twist on classic shoes: A guy who's got the best shoes will edge out the all the other men in the room. He's known for having great attention to detail and looking good from head to toe. If you can figure out a way to "twist" your shoe style so it works better with your outfit - you'll amp up your style even more. So you want to pay attention to certain features that are worth exploring:

*    Types of leather: cognac, suede
*    Shoe design: wholecuts, broguing
*    Accents: laces, buckles, tassels
*    Color contrast: two-tone leather combinations (such as Derby shoes), contrast with other items of clothing (like Cognac shoes and a navy suit)

There are companies out there that make excellent dress shoes catering to different styles. One that I'm a huge fan of is Paul Evans - which has a wide variety including Double Monks, Wholecuts, New Cognac and Suede leather shoes.  These guys employ the Italian method of Blake stitching for all their products (made of high-quality calfskin and suede uppers). Each pair is designed to last long and look better with age.

Make 'casual' look amazing: Going casual doesn't have to mean being on the same level as everyone else. You want to be creative with your outfit for those parties or events that don't have strict dress codes. Below you'll find some clothing items you can capitalize on.

Vests: The vest on its own is a look that seems to have caught on lately. You can try wearing a colored vest over a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up. This lets the vest become a focal point unlike when you pair it with a suit or jacket.

Wool ties: Compared to silk ties which are more common, wool ties offer some interesting textures and go well with other soft garments like coats or sweaters.

Accessories: You might want a tiny bit of bling to spice up your style. But be careful not to go overboard with jewelry since it can look distracting and pretentious. Subtlety is the key. Here's an article on wearing men's accessories the right way.

Have good manners: A guy who behaves like a gentleman will always look sharper and classier than one who doesn't. If you were taught as a child to say please, thank you and excuse me - everyone in town was most likely taught the same. So act like the kind of grown up that you and your peers were raised to be. This also means observing proper etiquette.

You need to understand local customs and rules of conduct wherever you go. For example: say you're invited to a dinner where there's a finger bowl provided before the dessert course. The right way to use a finger bowl is by dipping your fingertips in it one hand at a time. Then you bring each hand down to the napkin on your lap for wiping. However when you're the one hosting - if you're guest unknowingly drinks from the finger bowl - you should too so as not to embarrass them.

Use your eyes & ears: Think about it- you've been given a pair of eyes, a pair of ears and just one mouth. That probably means you should be listening and observing way more than you should be talking. So it helps whenever you mingle to keep those senses active. Try not to carry the entire conversation or think too much about what to say next. Instead you should pay attention to the other person.

Ask them follow-up questions or give nice comments about their look. When you meet someone for the first time - be sure you hear them say their name and repeat it afterwards. Not only will it help you remember the name but it's also a basic way of showing respect. It'll make you come across as more cool and likable.

Give off a positive vibe:  If you want to impress people the whole time you're around - lighten up the mood! You don't need the brightest or flashiest outfit in the room. All you need is to be happy… and happiness is contagious. If you manage to be the one smiling, dishing out jokes and making everybody laugh - you become the life of the party.

 You give them a reason to live in the moment and enjoy themselves. There's a belief that those who live the longest are the most thankful and optimistic people. So spread those good vibes wherever you go and maybe you'll help others extend their own years! We've all got one life to make the most of.

Say no so you can say yes: This time it's about not being too nice. You've got to learn to respond firmly with a no. That's how you will get to say a big yes - "Hell yes!" - to anything. We have to set a limit to how much we can do on a given day. We can't juggle everything - and there's no shame in that. But we tend to have difficulty rejecting requests because we value our relationships. Or we initially think we can handle them and they're worth our time. But that's how stuff begins piling up. Keep everything in perspective. List down all your commitments and mark the 5 or so that are most important.

Then say no to the rest - by calling or messaging the people those things concern. It's a bit selfish, but it's necessary. You'll realize that more good than bad comes out of saying no more often. You can spend more time and energy on your priorities. "Hell yes!" will be the magic words for things that matter - your work, your passions and loved ones. You'll know how great it feels to be in full control of your life.


The writer is a
style expert at
www.realmenrealstyle.com